Maybe This Person Isn’t Right For You

Lori Moulton
5 min readFeb 16, 2024

10 signs you might be in the wrong relationship.

Notebook with pros and cons list, with a wedding ring lying on top of it.
Photo courtesy of Canva

Your relationship feels so confusing sometimes. One day, you feel like you love this person, and you want to spend the rest of your life with them. After all, you’ve made a commitment to them. Your lives are intertwined, with friends, family, even children. You’ve been together for a long time. They know all your secrets, all the things you love, all the things you hate, and they get how you can’t stand cold weather, you love plants, and you will never live in a crowded city.

But, they get mean sometimes, really mean. When you argue, they get loud and scary, standing over you, intimidating you. It’s not that they physically hurt you, although sometimes it feels like they could. They rage for what feels like hours. You can’t sleep after all the stress and turmoil, whereas, they sleep like a baby. Then you get the silent treatment for days. These arguments don’t happen all the time, just sometimes. However, when they do happen, you feel so stressed, and you can’t ever truly relax. It feels like maybe this person isn’t right for you.

How Do You Know If It’s Time To Leave, or if You Just Need Better Communication?

You feel confused. I mean, friends and relatives are telling you to leave them, but you love this person. It’s so stressful to be with them, but what would life be like without them? Would you ever find someone that loves you this much again? How do you know if it’s time to leave, or if you could improve your relationship with better communication? Maybe things could be repaired.

After going through this confusion myself, and listening to hundreds of people wonder about their relationships, I’ve come up with a list of things that could mean things aren’t all that great between you and your partner, and you are right to question it. Now, that’s not to say that things can’t be repaired somewhat if you were to get support from a coach or therapist, but I suggest getting your own coach or therapist first, instead of going to a couple’s counselor. If your partner does happen to be narcissistic, or have another type of personality disorder, couple’s counseling could actually end up harming you more, because your partner could win over the counselor with…

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Lori Moulton

Certified Transformational Coach, Masters in School Counseling, Teacher, helping others heal from emotionally abusive relationships and build self-love..